Gender Switch Catch 22
My roommate, who shares the same interests in discussions of gender and sexism as I do, passed on to me article about parents that are trying to raise their children in “gender neutral” environments, but said children often conform to traditional gender norms despite these efforts.
One point of the article that particularly caught our attention was this: “One militantly gender-neutral friend who had withheld dolls from her daughter says she once walked in on her daughter cooing to a toy truck she’d swaddled in a pink blankie.”
All arguments aside about whether or not this proves that women are naturally maternal/caretakers no matter how many footballs you shove at them, what struck me is why would anyone consider denying a child a toy because of it’s implied gender role to be “gender neutral”. What, trucks — a classic boy toy — are gender neutral, but dolls aren’t (unless, possibly, they’re being played with by boys)? It’s okay for a girl to fit into traditionally boy gender typing, so long as she isn’t conforming to anything traditionally girly? Surely I’m not the only one seeing the fault in this thought process.
My own toy collection growing up was fairly diversified. My Little Pony shared the same toy drawer as my model T-Rex and Brontosaurs. I used to give Barbie dolls rides in my beloved Tonka Truck, until I buried them all in the front yard.
This is what I always thought gender neutrality was; allowing someone — a child, or an adult — access to something they enjoyed regardless of the societal gender roles enforced upon it. Girls playing with model trains and makeup; boys playing house and football. It doesn’t matter the gender of the kid playing with the toy, as long as whatever they are doing makes them happy.
At what point did the effort to ease the strictures of gender roles turn into pushing them on the opposite gender instead?
Comments
It is a good point you make. I remember spending a lot of time playing with my sisters dolls house when I was small and then maybe my toy soldiers would take over the house for a big battle! I agree though does it matter what they play with as they as they are happy? My son will play with a toy kitchen set that he has and then he will play with the model train set. The benefits of playing with all the toys can be seen at school where he is friends with the boys and the girls which to my mind probably means he has a more rounded personality rather than some of the boys who just hang around with each other and don’t interreact so much.
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